RUSH: This is the Steve Beshear’s Democrat response to President Trump’s joint speech or speech to a joint session of Congress last night…
ANNOUNCER: Now the honest and condensed Democratic response to President Trump’s first address to a joint session of Congress…
BESHEAR IMPERSONATOR: I’m Steve Beshear. I was governor of Kentucky from 2007 to 2015, when I was replaced by a Republican. Now, I’m surrounded by Southern white crackers in a diner I’ve never been in that serves old pie and fresh coffee. I’m a proud Democrat. But first and foremost, I’m a proud Republican and Democrat and mostly American. Like many of you, I’m confused by my last statement, but let’s move to something more exciting. I grew up in Kentucky in a small town where I inhaled too much formaldehyde in our family funeral home in Dawson Springs.
I had a pretty good run as governor, but havin’ Obama as president put a boat anchor around the neck of the Democrat who tried to succeed me, and we Democrats are committed to creating the opportunity to allow every American to try to play by the rules we keep changing so that they can’t move ahead. I’ve been married to my wife for almost 50 years. Mr. Trump, as a candidate, you promised to be a champion for families struggling to make ends meet.
Why haven’t you already fixed everything President Obama screwed up in the last eight years? Does the Affordable Care Act need some repairs? Sure it does. Just don’t make it affordable. I’m not an alien from some distant planet. You know, I’m a military veteran myself, and I, like my party, miss the Soviet Union but hate the Russians instead. Look, the president can and should enforce our immigration laws — just not right now.
Another Republican president, Ronald Reagan, said something we hated him for, too. And I may be old-fashioned, but I believe our political system is broken — broken after eight years of that clown we elected almost a decade ago — and that’s why I’m here at this diner where the tables feel like they haven’t been cleaned in 20 years but the waffles are okay. Thank you.
RUSH: That pretty much sums up what it was, the Democrat response. (chuckling)